Ohhh...was there a life lesson in that I was suppose to learn? Okay! Lets try this again!

Resisting what the lesson is there to teach you will not make it go away. What it will do is cause the lessons to persist until you finally get it. (From Choose Love on Facebook)



I know the lessons the world is trying to teach me. Trust. Love. Forgiveness. Abundance. Patience. Light. Self-acceptance. Self-confidence. Letting go of fear and doubt. Letting go of control. There is one problem I face which are the gigantic boulders that are on my path. Sometimes I feel the Great Wall of China is blocking me from everything I am trying to work towards. And there is no ladder or a 6'2" man with dark black hair and baby blues with huge muscles and a cool accent to give me a boost. (Yes, that last part was a joke...well kinda!!!)

What I feel I am resisting is change. Change of my entire belief system and what I expect from myself and the world. Right now, I am thinking what is wrong with that. I want that. My intention is to become the best version of myself. The only person that gets in the way is me! I create the successes and the sabotages. I create the good and the bad. So why would I not choose only good and let peace of mind take over the bad. The lesson: letting go of control. The unconscious expectations I put on negative situations that are going on in my life. I try to control and manipulate the situation the way I want it to go but, in the end, it will probably leave me disappointed and mad. On the other side which is getting over the boulder and The Great Wall is the serenity and calm of Letting Go and Letting God.

Fear rises when I think or write the statement Let Go and Let God. Because what if the outcome of a situation is worse because I put God in charge instead of dealing with it on my own? I was brought up in a religious home and went to Catholic school for a few years (there is nothing wrong with religion or Catholic schools). In religion, I feel God is portrayed as mean. Suffering, sin, punishment, and fear is what he stands for. So why would I want a guy who thinks like that making choices for me. (maybe this a core belief I need to change!!! :) ) I am not blaming him for the conditions of my life. That is my own doing! I am curious to figure out how to get over the hurdle. So I can believe there is greatness within me and be able to fully receive it. I believe everything I want to be or desire to be is already within me. I just need to tap into that space. And I believe it comes with Letting Go and Letting God. (And meditation and affirmations always help as well!!)

So what I need to do is put all my eggs in the God basket and have faith, trust, and believe that I am where I am suppose to be, experiencing what I need to experience, and know that HE will get me through.  In every experience there is a lesson and in every person there is a teacher. I am working on the lesson!